{"id":868,"date":"2009-03-30T22:55:23","date_gmt":"2009-03-31T05:55:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wwwold.sketchwar.org\/?p=868"},"modified":"2009-03-30T22:55:23","modified_gmt":"2009-03-31T05:55:23","slug":"csi-anywhere","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/?p=868","title":{"rendered":"CSI: Anywhere"},"content":{"rendered":"

Just as last week’s topic was a bit of foreign territory for some of the warriors, this week’s topic is a mystery to me. The sum of my knowledge of the CSI family of shows comes from the “Endless Caruso One Liners” video<\/a>. However, far be it from me to fake what I don’t know.<\/p>\n

With this topic, I figured the key was location, location, location. Hope you enjoy.<\/p>\n

\n

EXT. ESTABLISHING URBAN BROWNSTONE – DAY<\/p>\n

A prewar neighborhood in slight disrepair, but holding it together. Police cars on the street. Sidewalks barricaded.<\/p>\n

INT. APARTMENT – DAY<\/p>\n

Books, furniture, and bits of white fluff strewn everywhere. Two plainclothes detectives stand, backs to us, blocking the body. GROVER, a blue and smallish monster, turns and tilts his head. His commanding officer, SAM THE EAGLE, a very large eagle, turns to face him.<\/p>\n

SAM<\/p>\n

What do you think?<\/p>\n

The camera moves around to display the body. A tall, skinny, yellow fellow with a single tuft of black hair and unibrow to match lies severed at the waist, stuffing spilling out.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

Well Sam, looks like someone<\/p>\n

(beat)<\/p>\n

is a real cut-up.<\/p>\n

Grover puts on sunglasses as we...<\/p>\n

CUT TO:<\/p>\n

The theme song, The Who’s “Fiddle About” starts playing as the opening credits run with intercut shots of the city and its denizens.<\/p>\n

TITLE – CSI: SESAME STREET<\/p>\n

INT. LAB – DAY<\/p>\n

Grover enters and takes off his sunglasses. He crosses to a bench where COOKIE MONSTER sits at a widescreen monitor<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

What do you have for me, Cookie?<\/p>\n

Cookie Monster pops a piece of gum in his mouth. Grover tilts his head in question.<\/p>\n

COOKIE<\/p>\n

Me trying to quit smoking.<\/p>\n

(beat)<\/p>\n

Me find this security tape from building across way.<\/p>\n

Close on screen. Grainy black and white footage of the front step.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

Can you enhance that?<\/p>\n

Cookie taps the keyboard. The image on the screen becomes sharper, clearer, and full-color. The words on a scrap of newspaper floating down the street are even legible. A meter reader walks through the frame.<\/p>\n

COOKIE<\/p>\n

That best me can do.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

(loud sigh)<\/p>\n

I guess we’ll look for other evidence.<\/p>\n

EXT. STREET – DAY<\/p>\n

JANICE and Grover stand at a PRETZEL CART.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

Please tell me you have some good news.<\/p>\n

JANICE<\/p>\n

Like, the boyfriend’s felt is all over the crime scene, you know?<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

That’s not very strange at all.<\/p>\n

JANICE<\/p>\n

But that’s like, really incriminating.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

(exasperated)<\/p>\n

Not if he lives there.<\/p>\n

INT. APARTMENT – NIGHT<\/p>\n

Grover and Sam the Eagle scout for more evidence.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

We must have overlooked something.<\/p>\n

Sam spins and glowers at Grover.<\/p>\n

SAM<\/p>\n

Are you questioning my eyesight?<\/p>\n

Grover bends down and reaches under a couch.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

It’s not about eyesight...<\/p>\n

Grover stands up with a book in hand and puts on his sunglasses.<\/p>\n

GROVER (CONT’D)<\/p>\n

...it’s about insight.<\/p>\n

INT. LAB – NIGHT<\/p>\n

Cookie stares in his microscope. Sam and Grover hover close by. Cookie sucks on a lollipop. Sam tilts his head in question.<\/p>\n

COOKIE<\/p>\n

Me trying to quit booze.<\/p>\n

Cookie picks up four books. One is the book Grover found at the crime scene.<\/p>\n

COOKIE (CONT’D)<\/p>\n

One of these things not like others.<\/p>\n

Cookie eats the other three books.<\/p>\n

EXT. ALLEY – DAY<\/p>\n

Sam and Grover stand over a corpse wearing the uniform of a meter reader. Grover rolls him over to reveal EASY READER.<\/p>\n

SAM<\/p>\n

It doesn’t make any sense. He didn’t even live here.<\/p>\n

GROVER<\/p>\n

Sometimes crime doesn’t add up.<\/p>\n

BLACKOUT:<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Just as last week’s topic was a bit of foreign territory for some of the warriors, this week’s topic is a mystery to me. The sum of my knowledge of the CSI family of shows comes from the “Endless Caruso One Liners” video. However, far be it from me to fake what I don’t know. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[51],"class_list":["post-868","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sketches","tag-csi"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/868","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=868"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/868\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=868"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=868"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=868"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}