{"id":482,"date":"2009-02-19T10:44:14","date_gmt":"2009-02-19T17:44:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wwwold.sketchwar.org\/?p=482"},"modified":"2009-02-19T10:44:14","modified_gmt":"2009-02-19T17:44:14","slug":"an-old-fashioned","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/?p=482","title":{"rendered":"An Old Fashioned"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Perhaps I took this one a bit too literally.<\/p>\n<div class=\"fountain\">\n<p class=\"action\">Lights up on a traditional, proscenium stage. The velvet, red curtains part to reveal a door. Reginald Jeeves (a proper British butler) arrives at the door at the same moment as Lt. Commander Data (a very formal android). Jeeves tips his hat and extends his hand toward the door.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">After you, sir.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">DATA<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">I\u2019m afraid I could not allow that. It would be&#46;&#46;&#46;rude.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">Please, sir, I insist.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">DATA<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">I am programmed with the finest manners.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">As am I, sir. Please. After you.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">DATA<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">After you.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">After you.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">DATA<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">I must insist, sir, that you enter the door first.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">I\u2019m afraid that won\u2019t be happening.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">DATA<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">Then we are at an impasse.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">It appears &#8211;<\/p>\n<p class=\"action\">A Klingon warrior leaps onto the stage and cuts Data\u2019s head off with a Batleth then runs off.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">It\u2019s certainly not worth losing your head over.<\/p>\n<p class=\"action\">Jeeves mugs to the audience as a loud rim-shot is heard. SILENCE.<\/p>\n<p class=\"character\">JEEVES<\/p>\n<p class=\"parenthetical\">(Under his breath)<\/p>\n<p class=\"dialogue\">We\u2019re not at ComicCon anymore, Toto.<\/p>\n<p class=\"action\">The curtain falls and the lights go out.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Perhaps I took this one a bit too literally. Lights up on a traditional, proscenium stage. The velvet, red curtains part to reveal a door. Reginald Jeeves (a proper British butler) arrives at the door at the same moment as Lt. Commander Data (a very formal android). Jeeves tips his hat and extends his hand [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[75],"class_list":["post-482","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sketches","tag-fry-and-spiner"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/482","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=482"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/482\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=482"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=482"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=482"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}