Here’s my take on the “Bad Day at the Office” edition of Sketchwar.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
INT. OFFICE – DAY<\/p>\n
CLOSE ON MR. KARAKIS (dumpy, middle-aged) who stands in the typical drab office: fluorescents, gray color scheme, cheesy motivational poster.<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
-- the training session is in Des Moines, and there are a few clients to meet out there, so you’re both going on a business trip!<\/p>\n
REVEAL who Mr. Robinson’s talking to: MR. LIGHTCASTLE and MR. WORTHINGTON, two Victorian-era English dandies in their twenties.<\/p>\n
They sit at a desk.<\/p>\n
Mr. Lightcastle files his nails. Mr. Worthington studies his face from various angles in a mirror.<\/p>\n
A small handheld bell sits on the desk.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Will there be fox hunting?<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
Foxes? Like the animals?<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
’tis the season, after all.<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
Absolutely the season! Late November, of course.<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
You can’t kill foxes in Des Moines.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Bah! Then we refuse! We shan’t go!<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
We absolutely shan’t, of course.<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
Okay. We can get you up to speed on the training material over lunch. Tomorrow, we’ll go to the Olive Garden and --<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
We shall be dining at the club.<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
The club, of course.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Which reminds me, are you peckish, Mr. Worthington?<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
Positively dying of starvation, Mr. Lightcastle.<\/p>\n
Mr. Lightcastle rings the bell.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Herbert!<\/p>\n
HERBERT, a severe, formally-dressed servant, enters.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Herbert, go to the break room and see if they finally have any game pheasant one can prepare.<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
Or grouse.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Grouse will do, in a pinch.<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
If you absolutely must.<\/p>\n
Herbert silently exits.<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
We will get you up to speed on this somehow. The new technical writers arrive next week, and it’s your job to --<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Our job?<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
Ha! Preposterous!<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Our only office, my dear man, is to look eminently fashionable. Which we do quite well.<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
The apotheoses of couture, if we do say so ourselves.<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
Well, then we need to find some approach that --<\/p>\n
A larger, unseen bell CHIMES three times.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Three in the afternoon!<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
On the dot!<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Forgive us, we simply must retire to the local tavern. It’s been a difficult day.<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
Overwrought with fatigue, of course.<\/p>\n
Mr. Karakis sniffs the air.<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
Is that opium?<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Really, who keeps track of such things?<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
Indeed, who?<\/p>\n
Lightcastle rings the little bell again.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Herbert, prepare our equipage!<\/p>\n
The door bursts open, and an INTERN (teens) arrives out of breath.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
You’re not Herbert!<\/p>\n
INTERN<\/p>\n
(to Karakis)<\/p>\n
Sir, bad news! There are foxes loose in the building and nobody knows what to do!<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
What?<\/p>\n
INTERN<\/p>\n
And, and -- the CEO is about to attend the Governor’s Ball, but has no idea how to match his topcoat and gloves!<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
Oh god!<\/p>\n
INTERN<\/p>\n
And, and, the Viscountess of Salisbury is on her way to the company headquarters, and someone needs to entertain her!<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
What will we do?<\/p>\n
The two dandies stand as one, heroically.<\/p>\n
LIGHTCASTLE<\/p>\n
Stand aside, sir.<\/p>\n
WORTHINGTON<\/p>\n
This calls for Victorian English dandies!<\/p>\n
Then they flounce out of the room.<\/p>\n
KARAKIS<\/p>\n
God bless those crazy bastards.<\/p>\n
FADE OUT.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Peter’s take on the “Bad Day at the Office” edition of Sketchwar: “Work Dandies”.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1504","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sketches"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1504","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1504"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1504\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1504"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1504"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1504"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}