(Scott Johnson sits at his desk. Ivo Princip enters the office, wearing a suit and carrying his resume. He crosses, shakes Scott’s hand, and sits opposite.)<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Nice to meet you, Mr. Princip. I’m Scott. May I call you Ivo?<\/p>\n
IVO
No.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
O–kay…why don’t you tell me a little about yourself.<\/p>\n
IVO
Did you not read my resume?<\/p>\n
SCOTT
I did, but I was hoping maybe you could maybe elaborate, go into a little detail about some of your experience, tell me why you think you’d be a good fit for this position.<\/p>\n
IVO
You are hiring for engineer, yes? I am engineer.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
O–kay. Let’s start with a few questions, then. I see you’ve got your masters, that’s good. But you’ve only got one year of experience —<\/p>\n
IVO
— I am certified.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
What now?<\/p>\n
IVO
I have MCSE, CNA, CNE, SCJP —<\/p>\n
SCOTT
— That’s great, too. How about a couple of quick tech questions? Let me get a feel for your level. Can you explain polymorphism to me?<\/p>\n
IVO
Polymorphism. No.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Nothing? Maybe you want to try talking through it, see if you can’t give me a few of its traits?<\/p>\n
IVO
No.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Can you tell me why you would use an abstract class?<\/p>\n
IVO
No.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Define inheritance?<\/p>\n
IVO
Inheritance?
…No.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Ivo —<\/p>\n
IVO
— Mr. Princip.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Mr. Princip. It says here that you’re an expert in object oriented programming.<\/p>\n
IVO
Object oriented programming. Yes. I am certified.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Can you define that for me?<\/p>\n
IVO
Object oriented programming?<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Please.<\/p>\n
IVO
No.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Alright. Let’s step back a bit, then. I see here under this technology section you’ve also got Photoshop listed. You certainly wouldn’t be doing any of that here, but while I was working my way through college I actually worked in a graphics shop. So why don’t you tell me how you’d use an alpha channel?<\/p>\n
IVO
Alpha channel?<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Yes.<\/p>\n
IVO
That is…there are channels…many of them…this is the first. It is first channel.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
O–kay. Let’s jump back over to programming for a minute. Can you give me an example of a recursive algor —<\/p>\n
IVO
— May I ask question first?<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Sure.<\/p>\n
IVO
Are you certified?<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Me? No. I don’t have any certifications. It’s never come up. I really only have time for the occasional conference or seminar and haven’t had call to get certified.<\/p>\n
IVO
Then how can you be expected to ask me question? Is like…is like student, asking teacher, no? I am certified, but you are not. It make no sense, yes?<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Excuse me??<\/p>\n
IVO
How can I…to explain, be clear, to you? You are member of team, yes? Maybe I speak with someone more senior. Your manager is certified?<\/p>\n
SCOTT
I’m the team lead.<\/p>\n
IVO
So, is team of junior engineer.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
We get by. Well Ivo —<\/p>\n
IVO
— Mr. Princip.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Mr. Princip. It’s been interesting meeting you. I wish you luck in your job search.<\/p>\n
(Ivo sits for a minute, then gets the hint and leaves.)<\/p>\n
BLACKOUT<\/p>\n
LIGHTS UP<\/p>\n
(Scott sits at his desk. The door opens and Steve Kramer enters.)<\/p>\n
SCOTT
Boss. What’s up?<\/p>\n
STEVE
Scott, you know you’ve been trying to get some help on the team, well, I’ve got it fixed. I just interviewed a rockstar of an engineer.<\/p>\n
SCOTT
That’s great! Do you want me to talk to him?<\/p>\n
STEVE
No need. Already hired him. Whipsmart, and has certifications out the ass. Hell of an engineer. Ivo Princip. You’ll be reporting to him starting Monday.<\/p>\n
BLACKOUT<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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