\n
FADE IN:\u00a0<\/p>\n
MUSIC: Introductory music.<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
And now, the further adventures of everyone’s favorite globe-trotting performance artists! It’s time for “Raoul and Dave Confuse the World!”<\/p>\n
MUSIC: Ominous music.<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
Last week, in the final moments of their Azyrian mission, Raoul and Dave were captured by the beautiful-but-deadly Lieutenant Razzen.<\/p>\n
RAZZEN speaks precise but faintly accented English. A femme fatale type.<\/p>\n
RAZZEN<\/p>\n
So. Raoul and Dave. At last, I see the terrorists face-to-face.<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
We’re not terrorists.<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
Unless we’re terrorists of the mind! Blowing up your complacency! With art!<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
Raoul, seriously: stop. Lietenant, we’re not a threat.<\/p>\n
RAZZEN<\/p>\n
You were responsible for the balloon animals in Mogadishu, yes?<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
Maybe.<\/p>\n
RAZZEN<\/p>\n
... and the fake Northern Lights in Venezuela?<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
That was pretty cool.<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
But it never hurt anybody!<\/p>\n
RAZZEN<\/p>\n
It was very silly!<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
Thanks!<\/p>\n
RAZZEN<\/p>\n
Our regime does not abide silliness. Whatever you were plotting here, the Great Leader would not approve.<\/p>\n
SFX: A switchblade clicks open.<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
Ahhh that’s a knife!<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
Meanwhile, Dave employs his stage-magic skills to slip out of his ropes and deploy a smoke grenade!<\/p>\n
SFX: FOOM!<\/p>\n
Everyone coughs.<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
Quick, untie me!<\/p>\n
RAZZEN<\/p>\n
You’ll never get away with this!<\/p>\n
SFX: Alarms sound.<\/p>\n
SFX: Racing footsteps echo down a hallway.<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
Our heroes escape from the complex, with one short side trip.<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
Wait!<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
But -- knife lady!<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
That room has our stuff.<\/p>\n
SFX: A door opens.<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
There’s the activator! Just hit the red button.<\/p>\n
SFX: Beep!<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
I did it! So... we won?<\/p>\n
GUARD<\/p>\n
(muffled)<\/p>\n
I think they went this way!<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
We gotta get out of here first.<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
Meanwhile, across Azyria, the machines that Dave and Raoul carefully set in place each receives the signal and turned themselves on.<\/p>\n
SFX: Street noise and chatter.<\/p>\n
SON<\/p>\n
So the sky isn’t really blue?<\/p>\n
SFX: A loud click and a whirr.<\/p>\n
DAD<\/p>\n
Son, it’s actually something called Rayleigh scattering, and --<\/p>\n
SFX: POP!<\/p>\n
SON<\/p>\n
What’s that?<\/p>\n
SFX: POP! POP!<\/p>\n
DAD<\/p>\n
What’s what?<\/p>\n
SFX: Millions of pops!<\/p>\n
SFX: The background chatter turns into ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’.<\/p>\n
SON<\/p>\n
Bubbles! Lots of bubbles!<\/p>\n
DAD<\/p>\n
Wow.<\/p>\n
SFX: General laughter and merriment<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
And so, as Azyria’s cities are filled will millions of iridescent soap bubbles, our heroes emerge from one of the compound’s escape tunnels, only to find...<\/p>\n
SFX: Heavy door creaks open.<\/p>\n
SFX: Helicopter rotors.<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
A helicopter?<\/p>\n
HELICOPTER MAN<\/p>\n
Get in!<\/p>\n
SFX: Raoul and Dave clamber into the helicopter.<\/p>\n
SFX: The helicopter door shuts.<\/p>\n
SFX: The rotors speed up as the ‘copter takes off.<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
Wait. You guys aren’t from the USPAA.<\/p>\n
HELICOPTER MAN<\/p>\n
Nope.<\/p>\n
DAVE<\/p>\n
Azyrians?<\/p>\n
HELICOPTER MAN<\/p>\n
Ha, no.<\/p>\n
RAOUL<\/p>\n
Who are you?<\/p>\n
An old ITALIAN MAN clears his throat.<\/p>\n
ITALIAN MAN<\/p>\n
We’re with the Pope.<\/p>\n
MUSIC: Dramatic chords!<\/p>\n
MUSIC: Closing music.<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
Will our heroes escape the clutches of the Azyrian forces? Will aiborne soap bubbles blow Azyria’s collective mind? And what shadowy purpose does the Vatican have planned for Raoul and Dave?<\/p>\n
MUSIC: Closing music gets louder.<\/p>\n
NARRATOR<\/p>\n
Find out in the next installment of “Raoul and Dave Confuse the World!”<\/p>\n
FADE OUT:<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Peter’s take on the “Radio Drama” edition of Sketchwar: episode 25 of “Raoul and Dave Confuse the World”.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[158,159],"class_list":["post-1154","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sketches","tag-radio-play","tag-radio-serial"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1154","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1154"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1154\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1154"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1154"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sketchwar.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1154"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}