FADE IN:

INT. DOCTOR’S WAITING ROOM – DAY

ERIC walks up to a counter where a SECRETARY works.

ERIC

Hi, I’m Eric, I have a ten’o'clock appointment --

SECRETARY

The surgery.

ERIC

Yeah.

The secretary hands over a paper and a pen.

ERIC

What’s this?

SECRETARY

It just’s a form to verify you have requested this treatment.

As Eric signs, the secretary hands over another one.

He reads it.

ERIC

“I will not pick at any sutures, or pour acid on any --”

SECRETARY

It happens. Just sign to say that you won’t do anything like that.

Eric signs, the secretary hands over another one.

Eric gives it a look.

ERIC

What the hell?

SECRETARY

It’s all perfectly standard, Eric.

ERIC

“I understand that evil spirits cannot enter my body through surgical incisions, and possess me to --” I don’t believe in voodoo!

The secretary hands over another form.

SECRETARY

Then you shouldn’t have a problem with signing.

Eric holds up the latest form.

ERIC

This one just says, “No takebacks.” What does that even mean?

The secretary hands over one more form.

Eric reads it in disbelief.

ERIC

I refuse to acknowledge Doctor Stanton as a “noble demigod.”

DOCTOR STANTON enters.

DOCTOR STANTON

How we doin’? All through the paperwork?

ERIC

Well, no, actually, I --

DOCTOR STANTON

Good, good. We can get going then!

SECRETARY

Doctor?

DOCTOR STANTON

Yes?

The secretary pulls out a massive sheaf of forms.

SECRETARY

You have some forms for the insurance company.

The doctor GROANS, looks at the first one.

As he signs it --

DOCTOR STANTON

Of course I’m not epileptic, drunk, stoned, or clinically-dead.

SECRETARY

And the next one.

Eric takes a seat. This could take a while.

DOCTOR STANTON

“If patient dies, I promise not to use voodoo to raise him from the dead.” Really?

SECRETARY

It’s the rules, doctor.

FADE TO BLACK.